Saying “sure” on a regular basis is an indication that you’ve misplaced your integrity. Right here’s a brand new 3-step technique
“I don’t have time to jot down.”
Have you ever ever stated that? Do you recurrently squeeze writing into the evenings, weekends, and even holidays?
I did simply that, and burned out once I was a college lecturer. I struggled with the strain to publish, was exhausted from my 6h day by day commute, and felt I used to be failing my younger kids. As a substitute of taking time without work, I labored tougher — as a result of I assumed “If solely I get all of it finished, I can calm down.” That led to panic assaults, burnout, and a complete breakdown. (Hearken to my burnout story on the Author Revolution podcast).
Saying “sure” on a regular basis is an indication that you’ve misplaced your integrity. You worth others greater than your individual wants, and also you’ve fallen right into a behavior of individuals pleasing and saying “sure”, as a substitute of defending your self.
I’m going to stroll via a way more useful strategy. And this strategy might be targeted on easy methods to confidently say “no” along with your Future Self in thoughts.
Let’s dive into the three steps that assist you to just do that.
All the time ask for a couple of days to contemplate a request (even if you happen to’re requested ‘on the spot’ in an off-the-cuff chat’), e.g.
- I’ve to consider this and I’ll name you again this afternoon.
- I’ll test my schedule and get again to you tomorrow.
- Give me 10 minutes and I’ll name you proper again.
Get into the behavior of “pausing”. Which will already be extraordinarily uncomfortable if you understand another person is ready for a solution. Strive it in any case.
Whilst you pause, undergo step 2.
Your Future Self is you a couple of days, weeks, months down the road. No matter you resolve at this time, you need to cope with later.
When a request is available in, journal about these questions:
- If I say “sure” at this time, will I help or damage my Future…
